Painted Walls

You painted the walls with such beauty and care
Everyone would stop and stare in awe.
It's the kind of beauty that makes you want to step closer and take a finer look-
Then something strange happens.
What happened-
You see the imperfections and admire the painted walls
You notice something else-
The imperfections from before are darker, seeping through the mirage before you.
You start to scrap the layers
What you find is almost menacing.
It's an image of bitterness, cruelty and spite.
Oh, how you painted the walls with such beauty and care
Making one mistake,
You needed another coat to cover what you wanted buried inside.

There are days I have no words.
Moments where my loud effervescent mind is still.
It runs into a wall of glue-
Stuck-
No thoughts or words.
Just stillness.
Processing-
In the mind surrounded by words-
So many words
It comes to a halt.
It feels like no words exist or have ever existed-
Forgetting how to form a sentence.
Forgetting how to speak.

It's deafening-
The silence.
It's like being in a large field,
With nothing but empty land in all directions.
I shout out to you
But it's unheard.
I try to move forward and catch up to you,
But I'm tangled in the weeds and I fall far behind.
I shout out again and again.
"Wait! Wait! I love you!"
Still, you move forward
While I remain tangled in the weeds
Yearning to be heard.
Wanting for you to come back.
I'm left alone in a tangled nightmare-
Trying not to strangle myself in the tightly wrapped
All consuming vines.

You want me to write something short and sweet?
I wouldn't know where to begin.
I'm a waterfall of words

I lived everyday an empty shell.
A shell that was perfectly content,
Never realizing the hollowness inside.
It wasn't until you entered my life,
I finally felt what it was to be whole,
To be filled with life, joy, true happiness.
The veil had been lifted.
Everything felt right as it was meant to
My home was in your arms
So what happens when the inevitable happens?
How do I face the emptiness of you?

The walls are tumbling fast,
Shaking and crumbling all around-
Run, run, run
Try to beat the waves of debris

Words are deep
They cut like knives
You try and try and try
Stop trying so hard.
It's too much trying,
You'll push her away-
Take a step back
And let her say hey.
The words are good,
They come from a great place
Just hold on a second to stay at the same pace.
Bow your head,
Crack a smile,
Just wait a moment,
And say a bit of grace.

Happiness,
Exhilaration,
Love,
Adrenaline,
It's like a drug for the brain-
Everything seen-
Everything heard-
Everything felt-
Makes you smile sinfully so.
The world blissfully unaware of the happiness your heart feels.
It swells with joy-
Overflowing with emotions,
All it takes is a look or a word or flood of energy
And then suddenly your whole being ignites and bursts with light-
Burning with a fire so fierce and so true,
It makes you feel untouchable,
Resilient to the world's thwarting plans  

Untitled

There was a little girl who played in the sunlight all day.
She danced and played with the shadows that casted.
Painfully ignorant to the fact that that was not her shadow.
She did not play with the shadows caste from the light.
Until she had grown up and realized.
She's been playing with the darkness.
The darkness that lurks,
The darkness that dwells within her mind.
She's unable to escape
This is all she knows.
There was a little girl who craved the sunlight.
Who wanted to play and dance in the warmth of the light instead of the coldness of the shadows.
There was a little girl who played in the darkness
Blissfully unaware that that's where she belonged.

Darkness

Darkness,
It consumes-
From deep within.
It repeats your worst fears over and over again
It makes you believe the lies
It takes away all that makes you shine.
Darkness,
It's a volitle creature.
It takes the shape of the person in the mirror.
It makes you hate the person staring back.
From deep down in the treacherous hole
You sink further and further
Until all you have is
Darkness,
That will never subside.

Words of the Maniacal Mind pt2

Words oh words

You dance around in my head

You make me feel like I am lead

Heavier and heavier I become

With these deranged, unkempt thoughts.

Words, they spew from my face.

All in an attempt to have some grace. 

Grace oh grace 

Is what we lack,

Just because I'm a quack. 

Looney, looney in the bin,

Is where you'll  go

If you don't stay quiet from within.

But hear the words I will say

Instead of just saying, oh good day     

Crazy, crazy is what you hear

But being alone is all I fear

My words are screaming for you dear

Won't you listen and help me here 

Words oh words

They dance around in my head       

Sometimes they make me wish I were dead

Words oh words

They spew from my face

All in an attempt to have some grace

Grace oh grace
Is what we lack

What will it take to be part of your pack?

Alone, alone is where I'll be

Crying and trying to find some dignity

Panic, panic sink right in

This is where you'll  fit right in

Worried, worried all the time        

I just want time to fly right by

Frantic, frantic

Make it stop

Tell the mind I've had enough

Words of the Maniacal Mind

Words oh words
You dance around in my head
You make me feel like I am lead
Heavier and heavier I become
With these  deranged, unkempt thoughts.
Words, they spew from my face.
All in an attempt to have some grace.
Grace oh grace
Is what we lack,
Just because I'm  a quack.
Looney, looney in the bin,
Is where you'll  go
If you don't stay quiet from within

Little Bird

There was a little bird
A Sweet little bird.
It came to me the other day.
It told me to stay-
Where there had been no desire it sparked a flame.
There was a little bird
A sweet little bird
Who told me to stay-
That you'd be worth my time-
Worth the wait.
Just give it time and we'll find a way.
There was a little bird
A sweet little bird
It whispered in my ear and showed me the way.
There was a little bird,
Such a sweet little bird
It whispered its sweet nothings and then I looked up and realized you were my way.