Wednesday, July 8, 2015

There are days I have no words.
Moments where my loud effervescent mind is still.
It runs into a wall of glue-
Stuck-
No thoughts or words.
Just stillness.
Processing-
In the mind surrounded by words-
So many words
It comes to a halt.
It feels like no words exist or have ever existed-
Forgetting how to form a sentence.
Forgetting how to speak.
It's deafening-
The silence.
It's like being in a large field,
With nothing but empty land in all directions.
I shout out to you
But it's unheard.
I try to move forward and catch up to you,
But I'm tangled in the weeds and I fall far behind.
I shout out again and again.
"Wait! Wait! I love you!"
Still, you move forward
While I remain tangled in the weeds
Yearning to be heard.
Wanting for you to come back.
I'm left alone in a tangled nightmare-
Trying not to strangle myself in the tightly wrapped
All consuming vines.

You want me to write something short and sweet?
I wouldn't know where to begin.
I'm a waterfall of words
I lived everyday an empty shell.
A shell that was perfectly content,
Never realizing the hollowness inside.
It wasn't until you entered my life,
I finally felt what it was to be whole,
To be filled with life, joy, true happiness.
The veil had been lifted.
Everything felt right as it was meant to
My home was in your arms
So what happens when the inevitable happens?
How do I face the emptiness of you?
The walls are tumbling fast,
Shaking and crumbling all around-
Run, run, run
Try to beat the waves of debris
Words are deep
They cut like knives
You try and try and try
Stop trying so hard.
It's too much trying,
You'll push her away-
Take a step back
And let her say hey.
The words are good,
They come from a great place
Just hold on a second to stay at the same pace.
Bow your head,
Crack a smile,
Just wait a moment,
And say a bit of grace.
Happiness,
Exhilaration,
Love,
Adrenaline,
It's like a drug for the brain-
Everything seen-
Everything heard-
Everything felt-
Makes you smile sinfully so.
The world blissfully unaware of the happiness your heart feels.
It swells with joy-
Overflowing with emotions,
All it takes is a look or a word or flood of energy
And then suddenly your whole being ignites and bursts with light-
Burning with a fire so fierce and so true,
It makes you feel untouchable,
Resilient to the world's thwarting plans